Tag Archives: present

11242012 – The Storm

Thundering laughter,

Always a smile before the storm.

At ease, at peace, together.

pure bliss.

Thank God we did not know, that it would soon end

and we’d spend the rest of our lives

Longing, missing, reminiscing.

Living through a different storm

consisting of your absence.

No thunder, no lighting,

Just rain.

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We threw it all away.

Let’s pretend that life was different.
Let’s pretend you never asked me to wait.
Let’s pretend you had a little more confidence, I had a little more kindness, and we were both a lot more brave.

I really do miss our friendship, although I cannot honestly say that I think about it often.
At times like these, when I think about the past, purely for the purpose of reflection –
I question when and where we threw everything away.

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Never be so afraid of a tumble

As I spend the next few weeks sketching out a rough game plan for my future, I plan to write more. There is just too many dreams to dream, things to do, places to see, and goals to accomplish. I love spontaneity, but I am definitely a firm believe in plans. Dreams cannot become realities if we don’t even attempt to pursue them in some logical sequence. Plans change, but that’s what makes them beautiful. The future is big. It scares me. I’m uncertain about where I will go and what I will do and who will be there with me. Nonetheless, I’m dreaming and planning, but most importantly – pursuing. With all the choices, technicalities, issues, and conflicts that arise, I am constantly reminding myself of these words:

“Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions.
All life is an experiment.
The more experiments you make the better.
What if they are a little coarse,
and you may get your coat soiled or torn?
What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled
in the dirt once or twice.
Up again, you shall never be so afraid of a tumble.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

04022012


My inspiration for the next few weeks ~

Life is a gift, and it offers us privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming something more.
–Anthony Robbins


Dreams are fragile things.

Everyday routine consumes my energy-
I learn, I live, I make mistakes
“I’m striving towards something greater” I say,
But uncertainty fills my mind and my plans begin to shake. 

02092012


New Year, Old Me.

People don’t change once a new calendar is hung.

People don’t become better because they say they will tomorrow, next week, next month, later in the year…

Change occurs when our desire for change overcomes our addiction to old behavior and attitude.

We become better when we strive to be better – mentally, physically, and emotionally.

This New Year inspires many to make “resolutions,” but may our resolutions be deeper than just hopes: may these resolutions become every day goals and motivations.

Here’s to a new year, and the same old me becoming the person I was meant to be.

New year, old me, following my dreams.

 


Don’t go.

I’m fairly certain you will leave.

My brain has convinced me that I don’t have what it takes to make you stay.

It has made me believe that one day, you’ll wake up and realize that I am not worth it: not worth your time, your effort, your love.
You’ll walk away, you won’t look back, you’ll find happiness.

I don’t know why I am certain of this.
You have done absolutely nothing to make me believe the things that my brain has made me believe.
You have been so kind, understanding, and patient.

That’s why I keep saying, “I’m scared.”
It irritates you, every single time.
And for good reason.

But I am scared.
I am scared that I will lose you.

I’m sorry for being insecure and doubtful.
I can’t help it, I really can’t.
If you only knew what goes on in my head before I go to sleep…
I’m just scared.
I pray that you stay.